i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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