Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Randomize
