We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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