he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
