he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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