you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
