Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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