none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
