oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he puts the penis in happiness.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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