how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
