white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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