Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
