im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
