Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
