I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
