just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
