just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
