that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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