Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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