somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
