You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize