I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm passing your future prison.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
