im drinking this country out of the recession.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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