Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
