My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
