no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
