I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
My breasts were aching with rage.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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