I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
