I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
