I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
