I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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