I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
