yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
