the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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