im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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