I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
