Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
