Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize