Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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