brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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