Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
