whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
