I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
