Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
