ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Randomize
