Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
