their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
