i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
