how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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