dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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